old posts in laptop like i promised to share. :)

(taken from a part of my laptop scrawlin's)

23092011

So I forgot what I was about to type because I read everything above and thought: wow, I can never outwrite myself. :D anyhooo during that day when we had our test for MGT 162, I came down late so I used the middle staircase to go down. Ika and Ju were already waiting so I was just going down when suddenly Bam! Someone from the 4^th floor (iffa n nora’s floor) came out to go down as well. Then she started having this chat with me. It goes like this:

Girl: Hey, got class? (I was wearing proper attire.)

Me: Uhh…no. I’ve got…uhh…umm…test. (I was taken aback cuz she actually talked to me.  And I was in a rush too so I had this ‘why is she talking to me now?!’ reaction.)

Girl: Oh. Where are you from?

Me: Miri. You?

Girl: Me too. Where did you live? (She shook my hand. Like what?? Is it necessary?? )

Me: Umm, Bumiko. Near Hilltop. You?

Girl: Oh. I’m from Piasau. Where did you go to school?

Me: Umm, St Co. St Columba.

Girl: Oh! Did you know Afiq? Afiq Bazli?

Me: (heart thumping really fast) Yeah. Yeah I knew him. Why?

Girl: He was a friend of mine. I heard he had a girlfriend before, but now he doesn’t anymore… (blablabla how did she know this stuff?! My mind was already spinning.)

Me: Oh. Really. Huh. (Face: indifferent; Heart, mind and soul: GAHHHHHHHHH! WHAAAAAAAAAT?!)

Girl: Well, see you around. Bye. (Or did she say good luck? I don’t remember anything after that.)

Me: (stumped.)

So you see, of all the people on that fourth floor, does it have to be her who walked with me downstairs? Of all the people in Miri, why does she have to be the one who I meet in UiTM, in hostel? Of all the people in St Co, did she have to ask about HIM? I had this freakishly dumb idea of “oh maybe this is a sign” moment for a while. But then I had test so I let go of the subject. And of course I told Ju and Ika. They don’t understand my situation though, so it was like I was sharing my frustration (or something like that) with a squirrel. I don’t know why I picked squirrel but I picked it okay. So what. :P and tomorrow’s 102 final exam which is pretty intimidating. So I got to go study. Bubye. J <3

p/s: I threw the papers that I wrote about him and I together into the trash! RESULT.

23092011

 It’s yours by J Holiday. #nowplaying

I have solved the mystery of the girl. Turns out, the girl who liked Afiq in tuition last year when we were together, IS THE SAME GIRL THAT I TALKED TO AT THE STAIRS! (refer above.) I knew about this when I told Iffa. She said, don’t you feel weird bout that? And I said no. then Nora said, “oh yeah, forgot to tell you. The girl who liked Afiq is here, in uitm, in this block. Met her when we were doing our laundry.” I assume Nora heard my conversation with Iffa cuz she said the girl asked the same stuff to her (“do you know Afiq Bazli?”) so I looked at Iffa and said “that’s her?! It must be! Gah!” (well I didn’t really say that. That was an exaggeration. I just said “that must be her.”) so that’s how I figured it out. I don’t think she knows me though. I really don’t know what to do about it but I did go and look for her room just now with no result (sorry Georgia Nicholson). It’s not like I want to pounce on her or anything but I just wanted to know her name and her face so I can identify her next time. *evil chuckle* haha. Just kidding. If you asked me a few months ago, I’d be all “this girl will get a taste of my fist.” Or something. But now, I don’t really feel anything. For now. I always jinx it when I say I’m over him so for now, I’m quite okay with it. I’m sure when I see him again I’d be all “GAHHHHHHH!” so for now I’m not saying I have completely forgotten him nor am I saying I am completely still 24-7 thinking about him. No sir. I’m quite ready to move out from my cocoon filled with Bazli’s leftovers. Haha. :P hope I don’t jinx this. I’m feeling less for him. That should be good. It’s about time anyway. So I got to go study. This time for real. Bye! J

p/s: I did not study after the last post. That was a total lie.

24092011

I did not really study after last post either. More of a combination like: study-movie-movie-movie-study study-study-study-study-dance-study-study-sleep. Haha~ but I managed to get through 102 though. Surprisingly enough. I did all them past year and it freakin worked. I don’t have anything to type anyway so bye!

26092011

Mgt was not that good. Forgot to finish one question. CARELESS! Sapa suroh want to finish early. You can just stand it bah. Aiyerrrr. Today spent about rm 22.60 on food. Gah! I gotta stop spending like seriously. And stop eating. Haha. Oh yeah. I just remembered that one time when Cyrus Wong said was I close with Andrea Chew cuz I speak English like her, which was with a slightly British/Australian accent. I said no. but did I really sound like that? I should get it back. I should get my own personal accent back! Even madam Mag said have I ever taken course in British English once because I had the accent. Ugh. I wish I have it back. Nowadays I’m speaking American mostly, and it’s not good because not many people understand it.  One more week then it’s off to Miri. Yeay! So tata~ wana watch movie. J

30092011

I can’t go online cuz my credit has expired. Blergh. So boring. I can’t update my status bah. I have a lot to say rite now. Gahhhh. Seriously I need to study. I’m behind actually. Anyway did you hear? I DIDN’T GET HOSTEL. Okay maybe it’s my fault too but give la kesian ckit. Ish. I don’t have mood to go to sem 2 now. Ugh. Dah la. Not much to story2. Bye.

current: yep. went a little crazy during finals. hoho~

created last night, mostly about BREAKING DAWN

28112011

How long has it been? A month I think. Wow im such a lazy ass. Ok so today I officially meet my newest roommate. Name: ochi. Im1102b. at least same course. We got off pretty well, and she looks like unggal. I almost didn’t eat the whole day today. Haha~ lazy ass like me should not be left unfed. If not, we die of hunger. Haha~ im babbling. Anyway today was pretty cloudy n then it rained cats and dogs. Meaning it rained hard. It scared me off, I climbed into bed with tails between my legs. I don’t have tails bcuz im human, not a dog. Speaking of DOGS, or MUTT, *BIG SCREAM* I WATCHED TWILIGHT: BREAKING DAWN!!!! Oh my gosh I cannot stop telling you how ecited I was. My page (twitter and facebook) was both flooded with BD excitement. Niesha bought me popcorn and soda for me but I did not touch them at all. I just sat there watching the movie in awe. There are some parts I didn’t like about the movie. One, Jacob and the wolves. Come on, they were mostly in wolf forms in the book! Let them be wolves!! Second, the birth scene. They friggin cut the birth scene!! What the hell?! Third, timing of leah joining jacob’s renaissance pack was too fast. It happened a night after he left. Not right away. fourth, they did not include Edward’s idea of Jacob having a baby with bella, they just included that Jacob needs to talk some sense into bella. AND Edward didn’t look like a burning man at all. Grrr. I wanted to see that so badly. Fifth, wait, I couldn’t find the faulty fifth. Haihh. Nevertheless, I liked most of the movie too. For instance, I liked the wedding. So sweet. Even stephenie was there. :P and then I liked their funny honeymoon. And I liked it when Jacob appears, and I like when they showed bella as really skinny (eventhough she did a really bad job protesting in sick condition) and I liked the part where Jacob went against sam uley. The part I like the most is when Jacob imprinted on Renesmee. When Jacob fell down and knelt on his knee, it took my breath away. I was like “Oh, Jacob.” like he’s finally free from all that hurt he had while loving bella. But I totally get why he couldn’t break away from bella. Because Jacob, from all these years will eventually imprint on a part of bella, which would be her daughter. It makes sense of the love he felt for bella. I like leah’s story and pain too. I totally get it. I personally feel that the girl playing leah, nailed the emotion. I loved it. she should be nominated for an award. J what else did I like?? Hurmmm oh did I mention the beautiful and flawless vampire bella? I cant wait to see that. Kristen needs to get the vamp act right this time or she would just ruin the whole franchise. Although I disagree on the funny blow up part during her transformation though. It looked like it belonged to a parody movie. The scene didn’t need that chest cavity pop up. Overall I think Bill Condon did a good job with this. I still think some parts should have been faster or shorter(like the pre bachelor party conversation between Edward and bella) and some parts should have been slower and longer(like the wolf meeting after Jacob first saw bella pregnant and where Jacob claimed his Alpha rights). Oh I have another part I like which was when bella needed to drink blood and Jacob slid away from her, repulsed. That was funny. :D I wished they had put in the scene where seth warms bella up and Jacob shoots a death look at seth’s arm. The wolves didn’t even patrol for the vamps. Hahaha. But like I said, to me it was satisfactory.  To everyone else who didn’t know the story, it would be a bit confusing. But it was just nice. And I had hoped for the blonde jokes to be materialised into the movie and the dog bowl scene as well but I think that’s too much to ask. Anyway, I hve nothing else to story so I should go. Byeeeee. Hope this was worth a month. :P

day off with my friends...

was osum. :D I had the most funnest yet simplest time ever with my mates today. #ignorethegrammatticalerrors

 so we went to bintang megamall (or as locals call it: parkson) and sat and gossipped at mcDonald's for a while. then we go around and looked for Ana's dress for her college dinner. then Mimi show up and more dress hunting (which was really fun cuz i got to play Rachel Zoe for Ana :P)

went and see our old colleagues in Parkson, then we head to teabox, get our dose of pearl milk tea, got distracted by a watch shop (where Mimi bought a rm99 Lego-like watch) Ana and I sat down at a bench and talked cuz my feet was hurtin, then the others (Mimi, Iffa and Fitri) brought us to pizza hut. and yep, we ate pizza. I wished we had the 7 cheese pizza but it's alright; Iffa and I spot some cute waiters there. ;)

anyhoo we were so full, we stayed longer than we should at the table. I actually wanted to ask one of the waiter to help take a picture of us. Tried asking twice but I didn't dare to so Mimi laughed at me. -.-"
I hope the waiter didn't think that we laughed at him though. :/ sorry bout that. heheh.

not long after that we circled and walked without no precise destination. last2 Iffa, Mimi and Fitri go back. Ana and I hopped to Merdeka Mall next. planned to watch a movie but all of them movies were either too boring, in a foreign language that we don't understand or too scary. and I already watched Real Steel so that wasn't fun to watch anymore. so we ended up going to the arcade, belting out 5 (I repeat: FIVE) songs in Kbox section. songs included:

1. You Belong With Me-Taylor Swift
2. Closer-Ne Yo
3. My Boo-Usher
4. Kiss Me Through The Phone-Soulja Boy, and...
5. I Hate This Part-Pussycat Dolls

the volume was so loud we can barely hear ourselves. haha! sakit sora ooo. :P then play jurassic park where I *ahem* screamed. :/ what? I don't like big, scary ancient animals attacking at me in a booth with me armed with only a red plastic gun okay. the sound and screen fooled me enough.

had massage at Rest n Go station and off drinking ice lemon tea for me and iced Milo for Ana before her brother picked her up.
to top the evening off, my family took me out to dinner. I had mee kolok. :9 and now I'm online but I shouldn't be cuz I be working tomorrow so I need to go.

p/s: I should go out more often. but tomorrow, hello kiosk again. night!

love, Nina
from Miri, Sarawak, Malaysia. :P

left to right: Me, Ana, Fitri, Iffa and Mimi.
in stroller: Bella, my cousin. :P

wee hours in the morning

and im feeling a little bit creative. haha! i just wanted to mention that i met Baki Zainal; host of 8tv nite live and starred in Sini ada Hantu. heee~ well you cant really find celebz in miri so this means huge! to me la. other people din even knoe who he was. except for my dad. thanks dad for having sharp eyes! its almost three in the morning but im not even asleep yet. gahh. im gona be soooooo sleepy tomorrow. i just know that im gona regret this in the morning. haihh. anyways, its been almost two months since i blogged and i had so much stories in my laptop about my life. later i post la k. today i got my outstanding result and met Baki eventho i planned to meet him on sunday! Fairytale la sangattt~ :P so i gotta log off. cant have bloodshot eyes while working tomorow.
p/s: i cannot figure out the password for my tumblr. dang it.

I'm in MIRI!!!!!

watch out Mirians i'm home!!!!
gosh im like so excited and so happy and emotional! when we landed, i actually cried. haha.
i got here, get all my birthday gifts, dinner and celebration, and trus jalan g paxen bah. play bowling.
awesome but not so fun cuz not many people. sunyi.
anyway i made plans to hang with my gang but it's not coming together. haha. only a handful of people is coming. e.g: ana me n fitri n ani n hafreez. maybe. idk. haihhh. bah i need to kemas my bilik.
non malaysians who dont speak malay and happens to read my blog: kemas bilik means cleaning the room. yes, we malaysian teenagers also frets about cleaning rooms. i mean, everyone's room get untidy at times right? no one's perfect. hehehe.
so i gotta go. i'm baby sitting my favourite baby cousin in the whole world: BELLA. she's like super duper cute! byeeeeee.

raya! :)

it's in a week. Eid'ul Fitri is in a WEEK! i cant wait to go home and see my family and friends. hang, chill, drink teabox. hehe. gotta have that teabox man. aint complete without em.
anyway, lemme tell you a lil bit about raya history.
 hari raya is a Muslim holiday that marks the end of Ramadan, the Islamic holy month of fasting. it is usually filled with reuniting with beloved friends and family (mcm digi lah pulak.), atonement or forgiving and apologising with relatives and not to forget:
lots and a whole loads of FOOD. googlicious examples:

<----ketupat

 <-------------satay

 <------------Sarawak kek lapis @ layered cake

and many2 more treats and tidbits, sweet, savoury, sour you name it! we got it (almost!) all. haha~

anyway, im looking forward to having my raya this year, it's pretty dang exciting. since im away from family, this would be my first real 'Balik kampung' experience. if you were with your family and you balik kampung to more relatives, that's like old story, man. this is what balik kampung means! 'Balik kampung' are best defined by university students who's away from family, you know. and of course other people under similar circumstances but right now im just gona focus on me.

my dad inbox-ed me in fb, awaiting for my arrival. my aunt did the same too. i was touched. :')

it seems that people do care about me. awwwh. hehe.

melencong sikit dari raya excitement, yesterday was a TIRING and EXHAUSTING day for me and my two gal pals, NORA and IFFA. we went out to town and we shopped and walked around and went on a sampan @ penambang and break our fast at some village stalls named kampung Boyan.

 we ate nasi goreng tsunami, which was super awesome. it is this fried rice wrapped in fried egg and surrounded with tomato-ish soup or kuah. it's pretty good. next time i want to try their seafood rice. the prawns are delish! i am a shrimp liker. hee.

so, in conclusion, i am SUPER DUPER excited for raya and i am also going to be SUPER DUPER late if i dont log out and get moving to class now. haha!

p/s: I just love rambling, dont i? :P

fiction so far. "LIKE YOU"LL NEVER SEE ME AGAIN"

I woke up to the sounds of police sirens outside my house. With bleary eyes, I got up from the bed and went to answer the ringing door.

“Sorry to bother ma’am but is this the house of Aidan Bale?” asked an officer in a blue uniform. I rubbed my eyes and nodded.

“I’m sorry to say this ma’am but he was involved in an accident and was badly injured. He’s in the hospital’s emergency wing as we speak; doctors are doing their best to save his life…”

My world came crashing down as the officer continued whatever he was suppose to say. My vision turned black and I collapsed soon after.

I met Aidan when we were in high school. It started from a simple school recess conversation to a lovely friendship. He was the first close male friend I have ever had.

“Hey, you’re that guy from my group, right? Automatic?” I saw him sitting on a school garden bench during recess. He nodded.

“I thought I recognized you. That was some fun motivational session, huh?” I asked, taking the seat next to him. He sniggered.

“Yeah, it was. Everything in our group’s inventive world was ‘automatic’. That was way funny. Our group leader was really good at answering questions,” Aidan said. It was my turn to chuckle and the rest was history.

He understood me and I understood him. We were never the popular kids or the brainy ones, so we kept a small circle to ourselves. With him, I could be myself; the easy-going, goofy, weird kind of girl instead of the uptight, composed and controlled self. With him, I felt easy and not under any pressure to look good or act girly. I can totally freak out about a guy that I have a crush on and he would actually listen, unlike the rest of the male population. It was the first time ever that I could relate to guy.

“Oh my god. You’d never guess who I saw this morning at the gate,” I slumped into a plastic chair facing his desk and dropped my bag on the floor. He looked up from his homework and smiled, like he already knows.

“Don’t tell me. It was your mortal enemy, Zaria, right?” he guessed. It was like he has predictive text input in his head. Only, his brain is a natural computer.

“Yep. Now I don’t have the mood to do anything,” I said, lolling my head on his desk. He chuckled then, his favourite thing to do whenever I tell him about Zaria.

I thought he was a weirdo back then because he was into cars too much; it was his obsession. Nevertheless I took interest in his fascination towards automobile and in return he listens to my passion towards celebrities and fashion. He thought he was not that fashionable so he asks for my opinion on what he should wear.

“What do you think would look good? A collared t-shirt with necklace or without necklace?” Aidan asked. I put my brain gear into drive.

“It depends on the necklace. Don’t you have round neck t-shirt?”

“Not that much. The colours are too much for me. My necklace is this really cool wooden tribe looking design that I recently got, and…”

“No. It’s definitely a no to the necklace. Collared t-shirt, yes. And jeans. That’s good enough. No need to accessorize much because you’re a guy.” I shrugged it off like I was a professional stylist like Rachel Zoe. He actually listened to me; I saw him wearing it to the mall one day. I felt deeply appreciated.

He asked me out to a concert on our senior year, and I agreed. I just thought that this was a regular outing. On the day of the concert, all my fashion advices paid off as he simply donned a pair of blue jeans and a black round neck t-shirt. It was my favourite outfit of his ever because he looked like that werewolf guy from Twilight. After that night, the follow ups to a romantic relationship started and finally he confesses. It was like fate that we got together and risked our friendship.

“Do you know that I’ve been writing a lot?” I said one day. We were hanging out during recess, the only time we can ever actually spend with each other. Most of the other time he was busy doing prefect duties and as seniors, we were busy preparing for our big examinations.

“No, I don’t. About what exactly?” he enquired, curious of what I have to say. I smiled and told him: “About us.”

We were so in love but we forgot about reality. We forgot that we were just students. We forgot that we couldn’t be together no matter much we wanted to. We forgot that we could lose everything in just a fraction of a second. When reality hit, we became strangers, two separate souls depressed under the circumstances that we couldn’t avoid.

“Stop moping around, will you? He’s probably moving on. Does he ever call? Does he even ask about you? I think not. You should probably do the same,” said Moesha. I sunk lower into the couch, eyes fixed on the TV screen. I wanted to cry.

“There’s always hope, right? We should think positive. He might still like me. Who knows?” my smile was feeble, trying to soothe my broken heart. Moesha just rolled her eyes. Even I felt stupid saying that.

“No time for that, Nina. He’s gone. He was just another chapter in your life. Now move on to the next and see where it goes, okay?” said Moesha as she searched the fridge for what I hope is ice-cream. My heart ached so much that I can actually feel it cry, as I would describe it then. I know, cheesy but that was my 17 year old self thinking. Even now doing this flashback, I think I was an idiot.

I moved on with life, secretly pretending that I was over him even though I wasn’t. I lived my life like a zombie with no purpose. Meanwhile, my friend was right, he doesn’t seem to care. That made me fought back my will to surrender. The stronger I fought, the easier was the relapse. It was too much too handle. I made every effort of patching up our friendship just so I can be with him without actually being with him. Like everything else in my life, I would jinx it and it will fail miserably.

I move on eventually with much difficulty. It was never really the same; he was always at the back of my mind. No matter how hard I try to hide him and push him farther to the back of my mind, I can’t stop reminiscing. The memories with him made me the happiest girl in the world. It was a good feeling.

“Move that here, please. It needs to be straightened out,” I told a worker. I decided to open my own café after 5 years. Opening night was in just a few days and I was stressing out to the max. There were loads of things that needed to be arranged and done. I feel like passing out with all the anticipation towards my project. Friends and family members were expecting the best from me. I made the decision to open a business so I was accountable for everything. A lot of people invested in me as well, I just could not let them down.

“Miss, sorry but there’s someone at the door,” said Fatima, my trusty assistant. I wonder who it could be. Don’t they know this café isn’t open for business yet? Reluctantly I got up and see who it was at the door.